Wired for Love: How Understanding Your Partner's Brain and Attachment Style Can Help You Defuse Conflict and Build a Secure Relationsh

"What the heck is my partner thinking?" is a common refrain in romantic relationships, and with good reason. Every person is wired for love differently, with different habits, needs, and reactions to conflict. The good news is that most people's minds work in predictable ways and respond well to security, attachment, and rituals, making it possible to actually neurologically prime the brain for greater love and fewer conflicts. Wired for Love is a complete insider’s guide to understanding your partner’s brain and enjoying a romantic relationship built on love and trust. Synthesizing research findings on how and why love lasts drawn from neuroscience, attachment theory, and emotion regulation, this book presents ten guiding principles that can improve any relationship. Strengthen your relationship by: • Creating and maintaining a safe “couple bubble” • Using morning and evening rituals to stay connected • Learning to fight so that nobody loses • Becoming the expert on what makes your partner feel loved By learning to use simple gestures and words, readers can learn to put out emotional fires and help their partners feel more safe and secure. The no-fault view of conflict in this book encourages readers to move past a "warring brain" mentality and toward a more cooperative "loving brain" understanding of the relationship. This book is essential reading for couples and others interested in understanding the complex dynamics at work behind love and trust in intimate relationships. While there’s no doubt that love is an inexact science, if you can discover how you and your partner are wired differently, you can overcome your differences to create a lasting intimate connection. Product DetailsISBN-13: 9781648482960 Media Type: Paperback Publisher: New Harbinger Publications Publication Date: 06-01-2024 Pages: 224About the Author Stan Tatkin, PsyD, MFT, is a clinician, teacher, and developer of the Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy (PACT). He has a clinical practice in Calabasas, CA; where he has specialized for the last twenty years in working with couples and individuals who wish to be in relationships. He and his wife, Tracey Boldemann-Tatkin, developed the PACT Institute for the purpose of training other psychotherapists to use this method in their clinical work. Harville Hendrix, PhD, is co-creator of Imago relationship therapy, and is known internationally for his work with couples. Hendrix is also the author of the New York Times bestsellers Getting the Love You Want and Keeping the Love You Find.Table of Contents Table of Contents Acknowledgments vii Foreword ix Introduction: Wired for Love 1 Chapter 1 The Couple Bubble: How You Can Keep Each Other Safe and Secure 7 Chapter 2 The Warring/Loving Brain: How You Can Keep the Love Alive 23 Chapter 3 Know Your Partner: How Does He or She Really Work? 45 Chapter 4 Becoming Experts on One Another: How to Please and Soothe Your Partner 71 Chapter 5 Launchings and Landings: How to Use Morning and Bedtime Rituals 89 Chapter 6 The Go-To People: How to Remain Available to One Another 103 Chapter 7 Protecting the Couple Bubble: How to Include Outsiders 119 Chapter 8 Fighting Well: How to Win by Letting Your Partner Win, Too 139 Chapter 9 Love Is Up Close: How to Rekindle Love Through Eye Contact 157 Chapter 10 Live a Happier, Healthier Life: How Your Partnership CanHealYou 169 Postscript 177 References 179 Show More