"The Guardsman"

"Roger Dodger, keep it regimental.  These blue and red stripes have a military feel and remind us of belonging to a club, a group, a gang.  One thing’s for sure - with The Guardsman you’re now part of the exclusive (and ever so slightly subversive) SOXKS Gang.  You've joined the revolution.  Walk straight, walk tall.  Chest out, shoulders back, SOXKS out.  A swagger, wink, and finger gun are now all highly recommended, optional gestures.  These colorful ruffians exude the wow factor of a bearskin helmet without making your head hot, harming large wild animals, or ruffling your exquisitely sculpted coiffure. Atten-shun!"