St. Louis-Scented Candle

In the statistically likely event that you are not from St. Louis, you probably have a lot of questions about this candle. Q: What is that thing on top of the candle? Is that the famous St. Louis Gateway Arch?A: No, it is a toasted ravioli, which is a St. Louis delicacy. But in this case, it is made out of wax. Q: And is it supposed to be floating in a pool of blood?A: Ha ha —you must be from Kansas City! (Where it is normal to dip food in blood.) No, the red wax represents marinara sauce. Q: Can I eat it? A: It’s a free country, and you can eat whatever you want. But you definitely SHOULDN’T eat it, because as I said, it is made of wax. Q: What about the grated cheese? Is it real? I am fresh out of grated cheese, and I need some to rub onto my pulse points, for prom. A: Sorry, that’s wax too. And before you ask, so is the red “marinara sauce.” Do not eat any part of this candle. Q: What does the candle smell like? Does it really smell like toasted ravioli? A: It’s as close as we coul