Christmas Package Card

Deck the Halls and Unwrap His Balls Look, you could send another boring “Happy Holidays” card with glitter and reindeer and some bullshit message about peace and joy. Or - and hear me out - you could absolutely wreck someone’s wholesome little Christmas vibe with the only holiday card that pops harder than your uncle’s blood pressure after eggnog and a political debate. Meet the Christmas Package Card - a folded miracle of adult holiday cheer that literally pops out a dick when opened. That’s right. It says, “The Only Package I Want For Christmas...” on the front and finishes with “...Is Yours” inside - along with a festive pop-up peen. Sleigh bells? Nah. This year, we're jingling some other balls. Why This Naughty Holiday Card Will Make You the MVP of Christmas Because you’re tired of basic-ass Christmas gifts. You want something that’ll leave them laughing, choking on their sugar cookies, and maybe blushing so hard Santa adds them to the permanent naughty list. This cheeky Christmas